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Stress, anxiety, nervousness — when these feelings inevitably arise, lecturer Kelly McGonigal says it’s not about making them go away, but using them to your advantage. Expect possible resistance from those used to your non-assertiveness. If you have been accommodating in your relationships, people in your life may have come to expect or rely on this dynamic.
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The DSM, the standard psychiatric diagnostic manual, defines it as persistent fear of evaluation in performance or interaction contexts, lasting six months or more, that causes meaningful impairment in work or daily life. Even when we employ positive thinking and are well prepared, some of us still feel a great deal of anxiety about public speaking. When that is the case, it can be more helpful to use stress management than to try to make the anxiety go away.
So those are three steps that we share with people to help them to get into this mindset that stress can be enhancing. That the experience of stress can help us rise to a higher level of communication, and performance, and existence. Therapeutic communication for anxiety refers to specific communication techniques used to support individuals experiencing anxiety. This approach involves active listening, empathetic responses, and providing reassurance. It’s a way of talking to someone in a manner that helps to reduce their anxiety, making them feel understood and supported.
Even seasoned speakers feel stage fright, and the difference is that they’ve stopped reading the sensation as proof that something is wrong. When anxiety hits, your breathing gets shallow and fast, which signals your body to stay in fight-or-flight. Slow, prolonged exhalations and deep breaths have the opposite effect by activating your parasympathetic nervous system and lowering your heart rate. Deep breathing is the single fastest physiological intervention available right before you go on. The fear of public speaking traces back to a mix of psychological triggers, situational factors, and stage fright patterns. Knowing your own triggers makes it easier to choose the right strategy.
It really doesn’t matter what you ask about, just be curious and interested. Often, the most difficult part is asking the first question. This simple exercise helps reduce fear by replacing negative, “what if” thoughts with a clear mental image of success.
So all of us in our communication can think of a question or two that we could ask in most places in what we’re speaking about to get our audience to think about something so we can buy ourselves time. And when I do that, my students actually just take a moment to think. Some of them have told me it’s really helpful, because they’re really applying this stuff. What’s happening in the background is in my head, I’m, like, oh, my goodness, what do I need to say next? There is a convention of professors of communication who teach at business schools. And whenever I have to present in front of these folks, I get super nervous.
You may still have to deliver bad news, but (actively) listening to their perspective and showing that you understand their feelings can go a long way toward smoothing hurt feelings or avoiding misunderstandings. Yes, joining a support group can be helpful for managing anxiety by providing emotional support, connecting with others who are going through similar experiences, and gaining valuable insights and perspectives. Yes, breathing techniques and relaxation exercises can be practiced anywhere and are easy to learn. The online communication experts helping people speak with more clarity, confidence, and presence. Our specialists offer communication coaching, accent modification, voice and performance coaching, and speech therapy for adults, teens, and children.
For clients whose symptoms point toward clinical anxiety, we work alongside their mental health provider rather than in place of one. When clients come to us about public speaking anxiety, the most common surprise is how much of the problem is mechanical rather than emotional. Once we work on structure, pacing, and breath control, the anxiety drops on its own because the speaker has fewer unknowns to worry about. For most professionals, the techniques above produce real improvement within a few weeks of consistent practice. If your symptoms are severe, persistent, or interfering with your career, working with a licensed mental health professional alongside a communication coach can help.
For clinical-severity anxiety, CBT, exposure therapy, and VR exposure are the gold-standard treatments. Confidence builds through repetition, not through waiting until the fear is gone, and each presentation moves you closer to the speaker you want to become. Cognitive behavioral therapy or exposure therapy addresses the underlying anxiety pattern, while coaching from a speech professional builds the delivery skill itself. A therapist can pause, adjust difficulty, and repeat scenarios without needing real audiences, which makes the early steps of an exposure hierarchy faster and lower-cost to run. Anxiety reappraisal is one of the highest-leverage cognitive techniques available, and the research is striking.
I can’t be thinking about all these things that could go wrong if I’m asking somebody how they’re doing. I often encourage my students to start at 100 and count backwards by 17s. There are other types of techniques we can use to manage our symptoms. So if you’re somebody who shakes a lot, doing big, broad gestures or moving when you speak can give that adrenaline a place to go. If you’re somebody who gets dry mouth, drinking something warm or sucking on a lozenge or chewing gum — before you speak, not while — can help reverse those symptoms. In this episode we’re going to explore specific techniques you can use to manage both your symptoms and sources of anxiety so you can feel more comfortable and confident when communicating in front of others.
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So the bottom line is there are things we can do to manage the symptoms. By taking a deep belly breath, like you’re doing yoga or tai chi or qi gong, it really slows down your heart rate, which is the impetus and initiator of many of the anxiety symptoms that we find. So things we can do to manage our symptoms absolutely exist.
If the discussion becomes overwhelming, you can suggest pausing or shifting to something lighter, ensuring they know it’s okay to return to the subject later. These small adjustments help prevent the conversation from feeling pressured and keep the person engaged without adding to their stress. When speaking with someone who feels anxious, the delivery often matters more than the words themselves.
A well-chosen word with a positive connotation creates good will and trust. A poorly chosen word with unclear or negative connotations can quickly lead to misunderstanding. Before entering into any conversation, brainstorm potential questions, requests for additional information or clarification, and disagreements so you are ready to address them calmly and clearly.
- However, if developing these skills is important for you it may be worthwhile experimenting with this model.
- And if any of my former students are listening, you’re going to learn something that you saw play out in class, but you didn’t know was a trick I was using.
- When anxiety escalates into a panic attack, your role isn’t to solve it but to be a steady presence.
- Communication skills are crucial in today’s interconnected world, yet public speaking and interpersonal interactions may not come naturally to everyone.
The early rungs often start with reading aloud to one trusted person, then to a small group, then recording a video, then presenting in a low-stakes meeting, and finally progressing to larger audiences. A communication coach can sharpen your delivery and build confidence around speaking. A licensed mental health professional addresses the broader anxiety pattern itself, often through cognitive restructuring and exposure work covered later in the article. Public speaking anxiety, clinically called glossophobia, is one of the most common forms of performance anxiety. The underlying mechanism is the same fight-or-flight reaction your body produces when it senses a threat, and three brain systems work together to create it. The success of techniques such as these clearly indicates that increased exposure to public speaking reduces overall anxiety.
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The negative moods don’t last as long and are not as powerful. As a reminder, many people with SAD are very good at being in conversations but underestimate their ability. Many people with SAD do not need conversational skills training and their treatment may not include conversational skills training. Active listening in this context means reflecting what you hear in a way that shows genuine understanding. Asking open-ended questions, such as “What’s on your mind right now?
At CalmClinic, we believe that information is only as helpful as its accuracy. That is why all of the content that we publish is always reviewed and analyzed by professionals in the psychology and healthcare fields. Now we can add journaling to our arsenal of mental weapons designed to keep anxiety and stress at bay.
The Division of Continuing Education (DCE) at Harvard University is dedicated to bringing rigorous academics and innovative teaching capabilities to those seeking to improve their lives through education. We make Harvard education accessible to lifelong learners from high school to retirement. Without that foundation of trust and transparency, even the smallest communication can be misconstrued and lead to misunderstandings and unnecessary conflict. Employees will be more receptive to hearing their manager’s message if Placetochat vs Meetup vs Discord they trust that manager. And managers will find it easier to create buy-in and even offer constructive criticism if they encourage their employees to speak up, offer suggestions, and even offer constructive criticisms of their own. In a positive work environment — one founded on transparency, trust, empathy, and open dialogue — communication in general will be easier and more effective.
Overcoming communication anxiety doesn’t happen overnight, but by incorporating these seven habits into your routine, you’ll find that it gets easier over time. With dedicated practice, you can become an effective communicator who approaches interviews, presentations, and everyday interactions with confidence. Joining a support group can be a helpful way to connect with others who are going through similar experiences and receive emotional support. Support groups can provide a safe and non-judgmental space to share your thoughts and feelings, learn from others, and gain valuable insights and perspectives. Support groups can be found in person or online and can be a valuable source of comfort and encouragement. Anxiety is a common and normal human emotion that everyone experiences at some point in their lives.